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Being symbiotically entangled generally means: one part wants and needs love and support from the parents, whereas another part wants to get away from them because the person’s own desires for autonomy cannot be met in this parental relationship.

CHILDREN OF DIVORCE

Fathers can also contribute significantly to their children developing a healthy I and their own free will. However, they must not undermine the child’s loyalty to its mother, otherwise they contribute to deepening the child’s psychological splits. The unconditional love of a child towards its mother must be recognised and taken into account by fathers. Using the child in divorce and separation battles is irresponsible.

If his mother and father do not agree, frequently argue with each other and expect different things from the child, a child gets into an unsolvable psycho-logical dilemma. Children want to please both parents. Children of divorce, in particular, are often in a permanent quandary. My mother says this, but my father says that - what should I do now? In this way, these children bend themselves internally until they no longer know who they are and what they want. An apparent solution for them is, for example, to officially side with their mother, but secretly remain loyal to their father with a different inner part of themselves.