Читать книгу When I Was Czar онлайн

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Was ever a man caught in a closer meshed net than that which held me at that moment?

I stood fumbling with the situation in sheer and desperate perplexity. I remembered old Kalkov’s words that the papers might plunge the country into war, and that at any cost they must not be allowed to get into the hands of the Powers concerned. Yet if I left the house it was straight to those Powers they would go.

If, on the other hand, I remained, what could I do?

If I admitted to Helga that I was no Emperor, but a fraud, her anger would probably be increased, and she would carry out her purpose just the same. While if I went on playing at being Emperor, and listened to her story, I could do no good. It was out of my power to grant her the justice which she deemed had been denied. I should only be cheating her and emphasizing the lie which my presence as Emperor constituted.

To fall back on old Kalkov and curse him for having got me into the mess was comforting but unpractical; and I stood like a fool, probably looking the fool I felt, as I gnawed my moustache and twisted my beard in imbecile indecision.