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1 November 2010

I’m in a Good Place

Dear Democratic Voters:

Though many people are describing yesterday’s mid-term elections as a setback for my party and me, I don’t see it that way.

Most of you don’t really understand the pressures that come with being a wholly corporately owned candidate who also has to pretend to care about the hearts and minds of average people.

I know people should not have believed that “change” stuff dreamed up by Axelrod in his advertising office late one night. But amazingly they did!

And that despite my giving clear signs at every stage of my career—not that any mainstream reporter would ever research it and have the vision and fortitude to draw the appropriate conclusions—that I would always, always bend to the policies of whomever I perceived to have the money or the power.

Long before I allowed Netanyahu, Petraeus and the health care industry to defecate on my head in public, I was letting Abner Mikvah and his gang in Chicago—yes, the very same ones that choreographed Elena Kagan’s “meteoric” rise—run my life like puppeteers.