Читать книгу Инцел-изгой, эротоман, невротик-сталкер за девушками, музыкант и нарцисс с ОКР и перфекционизмом онлайн

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Low stress tolerance caused increased sexual preoccupation from the age of 3, and I began not to think about anything except about girls and pussy and about adulthood when I would have it all. All this is not my own speculation. Even Wikipedia describes how aggressiveness, depressiveness and libido are all connected there. When the stress tolerance is low, the organism needs to be able to quickly pass on its genes because it is «in danger, under threat of death.» That’s why my dick was always hard, I jerked off and, in short, went crazy over the desire of girls and fucking from early childhood. If I had taken anti-depressants from birth, I would have a completely different life and hobbies and everything. But I didn’t take antidepressants and right now I’m already 30 years old and I have already lived the brightest time of my life and I will not take any medication and will remain to be myself to the end.

After the psychiatric hospital and the impossibility of education (due to aggressiveness, hysterics and the difficulty of concentrating on crap that was not interesting to me, when there were much more interesting things), my hope to interest such girls as I fancied began to depend only on whether I would achieve respectability and whether I would come to success in fields in which I want and can practice. And me being a neurotic, as well as me sucking in sports and physical activities, all I loved and could do was sit in a room and compose music.