Читать книгу I WANT TO LIVE, LOVE & BE LOVED. a plea for all of us to find true joy in life and real human connection in peace and freedom онлайн

36 страница из 66

It is however this solid and tangible motherly love in action when the mother warms her child against her body immediately after birth, when she looks

12 In birds, for example, the fertilised egg does not mature in the belly of a mother bird, it is incubated by her from the outside. Sea turtles lay their eggs in the sand and leave the incubation process to the sun.

13 Strauss, Dagmar – The Process of Separation and Re-bonding: the final birth phase – in Franz Ruppert (ed.), Early Trauma (pp. 157-172) (2016) Green Balloon, UK

14 Mundlos, C. (2015). Gewalt unter der Geburt. Der alltägliche Skandal. Marburg: Tectum Verlag. (‘Violence during childbirth. The everyday scandal’ has not been translated into English).

25

lovingly into its eyes and gives it its first tender touches. When she immediately makes her breast available so that the child can snuggle up to its mother’s warm skin and drink the breast milk that is tailored to its specific needs.15 A child lacks this close-to-skin love when it is immediately fed with baby food and a bottle.16 Women also report that they feel bad when they cannot let the child drink from their breast themselves and have to pump the milk from it. If a mother does not develop a physical-emotional bond with her child, she also finds breastfeeding more difficult. This means that the child not only lacks the appropriate nourishment in its first year of life, but also the loving physical contact with its mother if she does not explicitly ensure intensive physical contact with her child when giving it a bottle. True motherly love therefore satisfies the symbiotic as well as autonomous needs of the child depending on what age it is in a way that is appropriate to the situation (see Figures 2 and 3).